Warning all NYC tourists

pauldun170 · 03-06-2009, 10:53 AM

If you are snooty when asking for directions you will be provided with the wrong directions.

Lucky3623 · 03-06-2009, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pauldun170

If you are snooty when asking for directions you will be provided with the wrong directions.

if you ride the subway, wear your iPod... otherwise you are get people looking at you like you are a douchebag...

azoomm · 03-06-2009, 11:01 AM

In Chi used to pick out nOObies on the train and just stare at them... kind of like getting on an elevator straight in and not turning around to face the door. It makes people really uncomfortable.

Method · 03-06-2009, 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucky3623

if you ride the subway, wear your iPod... otherwise you are get people looking at you like you are a douchebag...

A few other tips for the NYC tourists:

Also be sure to walk slowly and erraticaly in a line in order to block the entire sidewalk during rush hour.

Don't forget to take 15 minutes to place an order for anything while an increasingly angry line stacks up behind you, exponentially increasing your chances for an asskicking.

The only way to hail a cab is standing at the back of the sidewalk as close to the building as possible. It's even more effective trying to hail a cab while you're standing 50ft back on the street, and the cab is driving up/down the avenue.

Completely block the escalators instead of standing to one side so the non-fatasses can walk up them.

Talk loudly on your cellphone while riding the train (LIRR/MTA/NJTransit)

Ask me for directions to 5th avenue while we're standing on the corner of 5th and 50th.

Get drunk as hell and randomly puke on the hood of my cab while stopped at a light in soho (that cabbie was pissed haha)

Have zero ability to understand how the subway turnstiles work.

..

Holy crap I have a lot more. Where did all this angst come from. lol

fasternyou929 · 03-06-2009, 01:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Method

Holy crap I have a lot more. Where did all this angst come from. lol

I commented on CF already, but congrats on getting married!

pauldun170 · 03-06-2009, 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Method

A few other tips for the NYC tourists:

Also be sure to walk slowly and erraticaly in a line in order to block the entire sidewalk during rush hour.

Don't forget to take 15 minutes to place an order for anything while an increasingly angry line stacks up behind you, exponentially increasing your chances for an asskicking.

The only way to hail a cab is standing at the back of the sidewalk as close to the building as possible. It's even more effective trying to hail a cab while you're standing 50ft back on the street, and the cab is driving up/down the avenue.

Completely block the escalators instead of standing to one side so the non-fatasses can walk up them.

Talk loudly on your cellphone while riding the train (LIRR/MTA/NJTransit)

Ask me for directions to 5th avenue while we're standing on the corner of 5th and 50th.

Get drunk as hell and randomly puke on the hood of my cab while stopped at a light in soho (that cabbie was pissed haha)

Have zero ability to understand how the subway turnstiles work.

..

Holy crap I have a lot more. Where did all this angst come from. lol

Walking smack dab against the flow of pedestrian traffic then making nasty comments and faces.

thunderex · 03-06-2009, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pauldun170

Walking smack dab against the flow of pedestrian traffic then making nasty comments and faces.

When I lived there I worked caddy-corner to Radio City Music Hall. The sheer volume of Adidas sneakered, wire rim glasses wearing, buzz cut having, huge backpack with belt strap buckled Germans wandering around on the street was enough to make you insane.

njchopper87 · 03-06-2009, 07:24 PM

I like this thread.

Reminds me when the girl that does my haircuts visited Jersey for a week. She came back complaining how everyone looked that they wanted to kill her, was amazed that the highways (and every other street) have lights, and generally disliked Jeresy drivers. I just stood there and laughed at everything she had to say. Tourists..

Particle Man · 03-09-2009, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Method

Completely block the escalators instead of standing to one side so the non-fatasses can walk up them.

good fucking GOD this one pisses me off. Get the hell out of the way so I can use the moving stairs to get from point A to point B FASTER

I hate it when people decide to plant their fat asses on the escalator

Archren · 03-09-2009, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Particle Man

good fucking GOD this one pisses me off. Get the hell out of the way so I can use the moving stairs to get from point A to point B FASTER

I hate it when people decide to plant their fat asses on the escalator

I think that problem is pretty pandemic.. we have those here in Texas too.

03-06-2009, 11:01 AM	#3
azoomm moderator chick Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Hill Country TX Moto: Pasta Rockets Posts: 8,917	In Chi used to pick out nOObies on the train and just stare at them... kind of like getting on an elevator straight in and not turning around to face the door. It makes people really uncomfortable. __________________ We have enough youth. How about a fountain of "smart"? Come Play at the Track!! http://www.elitetrackdays.com

03-06-2009, 07:24 PM	#8
njchopper87 Bored Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Sumter, SC Moto: '01 Spirit 750 Posts: 1,535	I like this thread. Reminds me when the girl that does my haircuts visited Jersey for a week. She came back complaining how everyone looked that they wanted to kill her, was amazed that the highways (and every other street) have lights, and generally disliked Jeresy drivers. I just stood there and laughed at everything she had to say. Tourists..