Lie Clocks

[Gas Man]

A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "Why are all those clocks here?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie the hands on your clock move."

"Oh," replied the man, "very interesting... whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's clock," answered St. Peter. "The hands have never moved, indicating that she has never told a lie."

"Incredible!" exclaimed the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved only twice, telling us that Abe has told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Kwame Kilpatricks clock?" asked the man.

"Kwame's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.