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Old 12-27-2009, 12:28 PM   #1
Amorok
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Biloxi, MS
Moto: '06 Suzuki Boulevard C50T
Posts: 2,225
Default More woman bias

I have noticed over the past few years a huge bias against men in the media and popular culture. You can see this everywhere. Think of your favorite sitcom, the man is either an incompetent boob or a hustling, swindling, conniving incompetent boob. The only men that ever evince any understanding or compassion are gay, and the only ones who show any strength are misunderstood anti heroes. There are regular guys out there people, guys who know how to fix things and aren't douchebags, guys who love their wives but don't feel like they have to kiss their wives' ass or constantly acknowledge that their wife is better at everything than they are. Sometimes at my house my wife just isn't any good at stuff and I have to go to a lot of trouble to help out, but you never see this in media. On Yahoo today there are a list of ten things husbands should never do. Guaranteed that there won't be a list like for wives, so I'll write one. Here ya go ladies:

1. Gripe about how hard it is taking care of the kids all day. - Who wanted to have these kids? You got what you wanted, if you don't like it, well, now you know why we're so reluctant. Next time maybe we can all pay a little closer attention to birth control, shall we? Not saying that kids are bad, but I don't bitch about my new bike, no matter how frustrating something is. It's in bad taste.

2. Gripe about how rough you have it at home all day. - We respect our wives, especially those of them that stay at home. We appreciate having a clean house and not having to pay daycare on top of the other bills. That being said, you don't have it as hard as me. You don't have to wake up at 0dark30 in the morning, you don't have to look or perform a certain way, and nobody calls you out on anything. In fact, the only standards you have to meet are your own, and you've been at home all day. Nobody stole your lunch from the fridge, you didn't get saddled with someone else work, and there isn't a wife and kids depending on you financially for what you do all day.

3. Tell me you don't know what to get me for a gift. - What do I talk about all the time? What do I do on the weekends? Every guy in America has a hobby, and if you could take ten minutes to get over yourself and get on the internet for a little research you'd be able to figure out what to buy. For instance, if your husband rides a motorcycle and you don't know what a bike bell is, you're a bad wife. Not only that, you have a gift that keeps on giving! If you can think of nothing else, fall back on turning it up in the bedroom and you'll be fine. You know, the good lovin where we don't have to beg for it, the lights are on and you do some of that stuff you did when we were dating that made us want to marry you in the first place.

4. Gripe about gifts we give you. - Woman how dare you. I spent time looking through your drawers to figure out your sizes (doing the math I said I'd never need again in high school to average between fat and skinny clothes) and also looked through your jewelry box to make sure you don't have anything like what I might buy for you. After all that effort you need to say thank you, then return whatever it was later. How are we supposed to know about perfume? After paying for the house, cars, homeowners car and health insurance you're lucky we can afford and feel like giving you anything else.

5. Gripe about our driving. - You just don't get to. I'm paying for the car, and I'm still expected to get the oil changed, keep track of the tire wear, and pay the insurance. On long road trips I'm the one who comes up with the route, drives all but the last 30 miles when you give me that little break, loads all your bags of lead into the car, and I'm expected to be patient during you're million bathroom breaks. Anytime driving comes up, the only thing you're allowed to say is how much like Sterling Moss I remind you behind the wheel.

6. Be mad if I'm not impressed by the food you made. - Look, I don't care if it has a fancy French name and you saw it on TV, and I don't care if it took you hours to make. If I come home from work to a crappy dinner then when you fish for compliments, expect to catch criticism. You know what that food tastes like, and if it's no good, don't serve it to me. You know what's going to happen. And don't act like cooking me food makes you such a martyr. What do you think I got married for, to cook for myself? I ate pizza and Taco Bell before you and I'm happy to bust out my paper plates again any time you feel like you need to be replaced. Crappy food is crappy food, don't expect praise.

7. Make me shop forever. - I don't drag you to Cabella's or Best Buy, I know you hate those stores. I also don't take more than 20 minutes in any store, I know what I need when I walk in. As for trying stuff on, I know what size I wear. I've been buying the same jeans since I started buying clothes, and unless I've experienced a massive weight fluctuation I need the same size as what I'm wearing. Sp no, none of this need take longer than a half an hour.

8. Run me down in public. - You know how even if you've become a blimp I'm not allowed to imply that you've put on any weight, even if no one's around? Now imagine that feeling in public. You have no idea how enreging it is when your wife totally makes you look like an ass in front of people, and how much of a bitch you look like. I know the fish I caught wasn't that big, and so do my friends, but we're all having a good time. And as soon as my fish tale is over my friends will start telling theirs, because guys do that. However when you decide to grab some attention and call me out it makes you look like a bitchy attention whore who doesn't respect her man, and me look like a weakling who isn't respected at home. Thanks, bitch, hope it was worth the snarky little laugh you got. We're supposed to be a team, and just like I'm not going to let everyone know about that blemish you used so much makeup to cover up, I don't expect you to derail me in a conversation.

9. Don't fish for compliments about stuff. - If you ask me a question you'll get an answer, usually an honest one. If you don't like the answer DON'T ASK THE QUESTION. I am not a mind reader, so if you're not happy about something and you try to get me to make you feel better, it might backfire on you. I didn't tell you how to cut your hair, and I didn't tell you to buy those clothes, so if you don't like the way you look it's your problem. If you don't feel good about the way you look do something about it. Go to the gym, stop putting your hair in a ponytail, and wear something besides tank tops and sweats and you might feel better about the way you look. And if you really care about my opinion, you'll listen to what I have to say, instead of just getting mad when it's not what you want to hear.

10. Gripe at me for not doing house work. - Listen, guys do not get married for the joy of mopping or doing dishes. Sure it's cliched to call it woman's work but you go to any single guy's house and all he has is paper plates. Listen, we do house work, but the problem is that we don't do it on the same schedule as you. If I have dishes left and there's no smell, it's not on the urgent list. It's for sure not on the list that work, mowing the yard, and making sure you have a house to live in. If you really want me to do all the stuff you do, plus all the stuff I do, what do I need you for?


So there's my vent, here's the original article if you want to see what pissed me off: http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/1...ver-do-552285/
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