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Old 08-03-2008, 03:02 AM   #1
OneSickPsycho
Ride Like an Asshole
 
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Join Date: Feb 2008
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Posts: 11,254
Default Hit on a dude last night...

My buddy just reminded me of something I did last night... I hit on a dude.

So here's the scene... Crowded club, no room to move... the guys get separated from the girls and my buddy notices some dude trying to hit on his fiance from across the bar... I step in.

OSP: Hi!
Dude: (wtf look)
OSP: These girls are my friends and to get to them, you have to go through me.
Dude: (chest puffs out - hardness begins) I'd fuck you up man.
OSP: I'm counting on it. I really like your eyes.
Dude: (completely confused - bewildered) What are you a fag man?
OSP: Wanna find out? I live just around the corner.
Dude: (obviously PISSED) I'll fucking kill you right here you fucking faggot.
OSP: I like it rough.
Dude: (getting in my face) give me a reason...
OSP: Chill psycho, I'm fucking with you. This girl is my boy's fiance (point to my friend - who has NO idea what I'm saying to this guy at this point)...
Dude: Whatever you fucking fag.
OSP: Ok man, you're just barking up the wrong tree.
Dude: Your boy should keep a better eye on his girl cause she was about to give me her number.
OSP: (laughing hysterically) Not wearing that shirt she wasn't.
Dude: fucking bitch... (walks away)

Now the funniest thing about this entire event...

No more than 1/2 hour later I'm coming out of the pisser and this dude's right coming towards me...

OSP: Oh look, my special friend
Dude: You shouldn't even fuck around with that fag stuff man
OSP: Why? I thought it was hilarious
Dude: You're lucky I didn't beat your ass with that fag stuff
OSP: You need to lay off the roids man, it was a joke
Dude: I don't fuck around with fags
OSP: Your shirt says otherwise

At that point in time I was probably about to get knocked the fuck out, but the most gigantic bouncer guy I've ever seen stepped in and asked if there was a problem... "no problem sir, well... except for this guy's shirt." and then I walked away and went back to getting shot down by this spanish chick with a ginormous ass.

Seriously, this guy was the stereotypical roided out meathead with the spikey hair, skin tight horrible looking shirt... the whole nine. It was one of my finer moments.
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