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Old 11-25-2009, 01:11 AM   #11
askmrjesus
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You have not gazed upon true perfection, if you have not witnessed the horrid audacity of my mother's most dangerous culinary achievement.

Flaming Spam Cherries Jubilee.

My mom can't cook. She never could, and she never will. She kicks ass at collecting recipes though. Why she decided to clip out FSCJ, is a mystery in my family. Some say she lost her mind. Others maintain that she had an affair with a traveling clove salesman. The truth is out there. Somewhere.

Flaming Spam Cherries Jubilee is a simple dish. You take a can of Spam, jiggle it out onto a plate, cover every millimeter of it with whole cloves, pour a can of cherry pie filling on top, and then soak it brandy and set it on fire.

The result is nothing less than spectacularly disappointing. I lost two teeth, and an eyebrow that night.

To this day, my mother denies all knowledge of ever having made this recipe.

She lies.

JC
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Old 11-25-2009, 02:37 AM   #12
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Cranberry sauce and stuffing. And green bean casserole. But no one in my family cooks thanksgiving dinner so I only have traditional dinners when someone invites me over.
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Old 11-25-2009, 02:47 AM   #13
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Cranberry sauce and stuffing. And green bean casserole. But no one in my family cooks thanksgiving dinner so I only have traditional dinners when someone invites me over.
I would invite you over, but my oldest brother will be here and he'll hit on you. I wouldn't want to put you through that.

I love my moms dressing and my candied yams. I never had grandparents really, so no big traditions passed down.
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Old 11-25-2009, 02:51 AM   #14
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I would invite you over, but my oldest brother will be here and he'll hit on you. I wouldn't want to put you through that.

I love my moms dressing and my candied yams. I never had grandparents really, so no big traditions passed down.
Trust me, I'll be so busy stuffing my face, I won't notice. But for future reference is he hot and rich?

I don't have any family to spend my thanksgiving with this year, so I'm driving to LA and having thanksgiving dinner at a diner.
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Old 11-25-2009, 02:59 AM   #15
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Trust me, I'll be so busy stuffing my face, I won't notice. But for future reference is he hot and rich?

I don't have any family to spend my thanksgiving with this year, so I'm driving to LA and having thanksgiving dinner at a diner.
If he was, I would have invited you over a long time ago honey!

No, this is my degenerate brother who has a hard time keeping a job, hair and teeth...he told me last week he has almost saved up enough to get partial dentures.

Man, now I feel bad for making fun of him....he tries hard for sure. He's just kinda dumb and missing a few teeth is all.
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Old 11-25-2009, 03:07 AM   #16
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He's just kinda dumb and missing a few teeth is all.
OMG i nearly choked on my booze reading that.
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Old 11-25-2009, 07:11 AM   #17
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Pumpkin pie smothered with whipped cream. I love pumpkin pie. Ulu has bitchin pie.
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Old 11-25-2009, 07:20 AM   #18
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Originally Posted by askmrjesus View Post
You have not gazed upon true perfection, if you have not witnessed the horrid audacity of my mother's most dangerous culinary achievement.

Flaming Spam Cherries Jubilee.

My mom can't cook. She never could, and she never will. She kicks ass at collecting recipes though. Why she decided to clip out FSCJ, is a mystery in my family. Some say she lost her mind. Others maintain that she had an affair with a traveling clove salesman. The truth is out there. Somewhere.

Flaming Spam Cherries Jubilee is a simple dish. You take a can of Spam, jiggle it out onto a plate, cover every millimeter of it with whole cloves, pour a can of cherry pie filling on top, and then soak it brandy and set it on fire.

The result is nothing less than spectacularly disappointing. I lost two teeth, and an eyebrow that night.

To this day, my mother denies all knowledge of ever having made this recipe.

She lies.

JC
BTW, I read this at 1am while trying to be quiet as my hubby slept. I failed thanks to you.
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Old 11-25-2009, 08:44 AM   #19
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Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday!

Turkey, mashed potatoes, baked corn, sweet potatoes, stuffing, pumpkin pie (with real pumpkin) green bean casserele.

Deviled eggs FTMFW!

Damn it, now I'm hungry and I have to wait another 32 hours...

Mom always makes it best but all 4 grandmothers do an excellent job as well.

MIL doesn't cook.
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Old 11-25-2009, 10:23 AM   #20
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I always look forward to the turkey, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie.
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