I think I might have screwed up... - Page 2

pauldun170 · 10-05-2009, 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by askmrjesus

No can do.

When it comes to posting up pics of hot girls, I pretty much draw the line at grieving widows.

I'm just weird that way.

JC

fine...be that way.

HokieDNA01 · 10-05-2009, 06:53 PM

You didn't teach her anything that she couldn't have easily learned online. She may have been asking you to teach her safety because she didn't want to risk not knowing how to handle a weapon the way her husband did. The fact that she opened up to you is a good thing. I would try to check in with her and see how she is doing. You had no way to know.

Fleck750 · 10-05-2009, 07:00 PM

She might have been trying to figure what happened when the gun went off when her husband died. I don't think you did anything wrong. If it wasn't you she asked, it would have been someone else.

askmrjesus · 10-05-2009, 07:18 PM

I know it's not a question of fault, it's just a fucked up situation all around.

And yes, there's no way I could have known. It's not like she was wearing a t-shirt that said, "Hi, I'm in terrible emotional state because my husband just shot himself", it's just that the whole thing freaked me out a little.

JC

Amorok · 10-05-2009, 07:29 PM

There's no way you could have seen this coming. You're going to be a little freaked out, but nowhere near as bad as she is. All you can do is try to be supportive. Check in on her enough to let her know you care and make sure she's ok, and just try to be a good friend, which you already have by teaching her safety first. Sorry you have to make the best of suck a fucked situation.

TommyHotWheel · 10-05-2009, 07:31 PM

Call and talk with her, tell her how you feel about what happened and see where she is with it. Maybe you can intevene and suggest counsel or a therapy group, you just may save her.

Kaneman · 10-05-2009, 07:39 PM

Have you fucked her sister yet?

fasternyou929 · 10-05-2009, 08:02 PM

On the other hand, you may just have helped her come to terms with her husband's death. You took away the unknowns she had about guns, and probably some of the fears she had based on her unfamiliarity with them.

I dated a girl years ago whose father was killed by a gun (neither self inflicted nor accidental). She had a deep-seated fear of all guns and anything related to them until the day she went to the shooting range and shot one herself. She's still not a huge fan of guns, but, according to her, it was one of the best coping mechanisms she had tried over the course of 10 years.

If I were in your shoes, I would have preferred to know before the crying on the shoulder part, too.

But I wouldn't assume anything you did was for the worst. Probably quite the opposite.

Adeptus_Minor · 10-05-2009, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fasternyou929

On the other hand, you may just have helped her come to terms with her husband's death. You took away the unknowns she had about guns, and probably some of the fears she had based on her unfamiliarity with them.

If I were in your shoes, I would have preferred to know before the crying on the shoulder part, too.

But I wouldn't assume anything you did was for the worst. Probably quite the opposite.

Yeah, that's kind of how I was thinking of if.

Trip · 10-05-2009, 08:35 PM

Holy crap, yeah you didn't know, nothing you could do.

10-05-2009, 06:53 PM	#12
HokieDNA01 WERA White Plate Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Nashville, TN Moto: 2007 Suzuki GSX-r 750 Posts: 1,404	You didn't teach her anything that she couldn't have easily learned online. She may have been asking you to teach her safety because she didn't want to risk not knowing how to handle a weapon the way her husband did. The fact that she opened up to you is a good thing. I would try to check in with her and see how she is doing. You had no way to know. __________________ XX>XY 2014 Honda NC700X 2007 Suzuki GSX-r 750 2000 Yamaha XT225 2004 Kawasaki EX250 (sold)

10-05-2009, 07:00 PM	#13
Fleck750 Spiker bike Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: KCK Moto: KZ750 Posts: 1,629	She might have been trying to figure what happened when the gun went off when her husband died. I don't think you did anything wrong. If it wasn't you she asked, it would have been someone else. __________________ I ride way too fast to worry about cholesterol. ~Author Unknown

10-05-2009, 07:18 PM	#14
askmrjesus Soul Man Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Everywhere, all the time. Moto: '0000 Custom Turbo Cross (with jet kit). Posts: 6,481	I know it's not a question of fault, it's just a fucked up situation all around. And yes, there's no way I could have known. It's not like she was wearing a t-shirt that said, "Hi, I'm in terrible emotional state because my husband just shot himself", it's just that the whole thing freaked me out a little. JC __________________ The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me.

10-05-2009, 07:31 PM	#16
TommyHotWheel Imported from Detroit Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Michigan Moto: 2001 Suzuki TL1000R Posts: 989	Call and talk with her, tell her how you feel about what happened and see where she is with it. Maybe you can intevene and suggest counsel or a therapy group, you just may save her. __________________ Cry Havok! And let slip the hogs of war!

10-05-2009, 07:39 PM	#17
Kaneman AMA Supersport Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Odessa, TX Moto: 2000 Honda CBR1100XX Blackbird Posts: 4,931	Have you fucked her sister yet? __________________ 1982 Honda XR80 - blown motor, 1993 Kawasaki ZX6D - sold, 2001 Suzuki Bandit 1200S - sold, 1984 Honda Magna - sold, 2001 Kawasaki ZRX1200R - blown motor, 2007 Suzuki DL1000 V-Strom - totalled, 2003 Yamaha FZ1 - sold, 1994 Honda Magna - sold, 2001 Honda CBR600F4i - sold, 1998 Suzuki DR350 - stolen, 1989 Honda Super Magna - sold, 2007 Yamaha Stratoliner, 2000 Honda CBR 1100XX Blackbird

10-05-2009, 07:29 PM	#15
Amorok Issukangitok Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Biloxi, MS Moto: '06 Suzuki Boulevard C50T Posts: 2,225	There's no way you could have seen this coming. You're going to be a little freaked out, but nowhere near as bad as she is. All you can do is try to be supportive. Check in on her enough to let her know you care and make sure she's ok, and just try to be a good friend, which you already have by teaching her safety first. Sorry you have to make the best of suck a fucked situation.

10-05-2009, 08:02 PM	#18
fasternyou929 SFL Expatriate #2 Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Raleigh, NC Moto: CBR1000 Posts: 2,043	On the other hand, you may just have helped her come to terms with her husband's death. You took away the unknowns she had about guns, and probably some of the fears she had based on her unfamiliarity with them. I dated a girl years ago whose father was killed by a gun (neither self inflicted nor accidental). She had a deep-seated fear of all guns and anything related to them until the day she went to the shooting range and shot one herself. She's still not a huge fan of guns, but, according to her, it was one of the best coping mechanisms she had tried over the course of 10 years. If I were in your shoes, I would have preferred to know before the crying on the shoulder part, too. But I wouldn't assume anything you did was for the worst. Probably quite the opposite.