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Old 12-10-2009, 02:25 PM   #11
HurricaneHeather
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Female: I love when you ask to borrow my truck, use up ALL of my gas, hand me the keys and say, “the gas light came on, you might want to gas it up…” I just flippin love that.
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Old 12-10-2009, 02:27 PM   #12
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Female: My car has a light that flashes 'slip'. Like I may be unaware that I'm slipping as I slide into the light pole.
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Old 12-10-2009, 05:10 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by neebelung View Post
MALE: With powers comparable to Wonderboy's!
lmao.


Mine: "Sex turns gay people straight and gay people into Mexicans. Everyone goes down a notch."

Male: An enclosed garage is not the place to hook up a siren on the gocart!!!!

Female: The sun needs to stop tricking me.
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Old 12-10-2009, 07:01 PM   #14
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Here are 2 of my fav's from todays selection

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Old 12-11-2009, 07:31 PM   #15
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Old 12-15-2009, 02:08 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by derf View Post
Here are 2 of my fav's from todays selection



All the guys in the warehouse here call her Larry Gaga.


Here's a selection from today....

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Male: Hey Santa! Last year u gave me a sweater for Christmas...this year I would prefer a moaner or a screamer, please and thankyou!
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Old 12-15-2009, 03:18 PM   #17
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All of mine are either about finals or christmas break.
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Old 12-15-2009, 04:55 PM   #18
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I don't know what his status says, but a friend of mine told me that my ex is posting up the things I am getting our son for Christmas as if he bought them. LOSER!
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Old 12-15-2009, 05:00 PM   #19
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I have a friend that every single post every single day includes something about her boyfriend Anthony Flores and how she's going to be happy forever, love of her life, can't live without him. Including the "My divorce papers are being filed today - I'm going to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend Anthony Flores"

I GET that you're happy. But wow. what happens if Anthony Flores leaves you? You will have nothing to do or talk about apparently.
I'll post it up later tonight - it's hillarious.
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Old 12-15-2009, 05:33 PM   #20
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FEMALE: Just broke up with jeff, goin out a gettin me some!!!!!!!!!!

(i'm jeff and i havent heard a damn thing about it)

FEMALE: A Maxim magazine came to my office, my one boss threw it on my desk and said "Here, you have this, you like to look at this stuff, and we cant put this in the waiting room." He still thinks im a raging dykeaholic. Awesome...

(she always has the best statuses)
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