Go Back   Two Wheel Fix > In the Garage or Shop > Manufacturer War

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-02-2011, 11:01 AM   #1
azoomm
moderator chick

 
azoomm's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Hill Country TX
Moto: Pasta Rockets
Posts: 8,917
Default S1000RR - funnies

As posted on another forum...




the s1000rr is so fast that it's the only bike who's lap times are expressed with a negative number

when you do a valve adjustment on a s1000rr, the valves automatically get adjusted on any other bikes in the vicinity

actually, the valves on the s1000rr never go out of spec, the specs get rewritten based on its valve clearance

normal dino oil automatically becomes synthetic when used in an s1000rr. also its becomes fat free and tastes great over a salad.

the 1000 in the s1000rr name actually denotes the bike's trap speed in miles per hour during 1/4 mile runs, i mean 1/8 mile runs

the s1000rr is the only bike that backs it in with the front wheel

the s1000rr doesnt pose at starbucks, starbucks poses next to it

the s1000rr uses an rsv4 as a pitbike

you will never find a printout of a dyno sheet on an s1000rr because they havent made a sheet of paper big enough for it

the s1000rr is the only bike that can indicate a left turn and a right turn at the same time and then follow through

if you put an s1000rr sticker on your toyota, toyota wont recall it because its already awesome

the s1000rr is so awesome it collected jay leno

the s1000rr can not only do a 12 oclock wheelie, but it can do the noon and midnight versions

the BMW s1000r has four modes...rain, awesome, awesomer, and chuck norris

The S1000rr is so rad it will turn your Areosticth into Jeans and tshirt. And vice versa.

the S1000RR is so awesome that Aprilia recalled all RSV4s to put S1000RR engines in them

when an s1000rr does a burnout, it actually spins the earth under its rear wheel and stops the earth's rotation with the front wheel all at the same time!
__________________
We have enough youth. How about a fountain of "smart"?

Come Play at the Track!!

http://www.elitetrackdays.com
azoomm is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 11:27 AM   #2
shmike
Follower
 
shmike's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 5,549
Default

I still think the BMW's race record is the best joke of all!
__________________
Racing For Smiles
shmike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 11:27 AM   #3
tommymac
Moto GP Star
 
tommymac's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 11,022
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by shmike View Post
I still think the BMW's race record is the best joke of all!
Doh
tommymac is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 11:37 AM   #4
Dave
Chaotic Neutral
 
Dave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Cherry Hill NJ
Moto: GV1200 Madura, Hawk gt
Posts: 13,992
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by shmike View Post
i still think the bmw's race record is the best joke of all!
qft.
Dave is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 11:42 AM   #5
fasternyou929
SFL Expatriate #2
 
fasternyou929's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Raleigh, NC
Moto: CBR1000
Posts: 2,043
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by shmike View Post
I still think the BMW's race record is the best joke of all!
Beat me to it. I was talking to a friend of mine during the last WSBK round about how Haslam did better (much better) on a satellite Honda. Even the announcers were taking digs at how long it has taken BMW to react to known issues; tire management in particular as Corser once again faded from podium position in the second half of the race.
fasternyou929 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 11:50 AM   #6
Dave
Chaotic Neutral
 
Dave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Cherry Hill NJ
Moto: GV1200 Madura, Hawk gt
Posts: 13,992
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by fasternyou929 View Post
Beat me to it. I was talking to a friend of mine during the last WSBK round about how Haslam did better (much better) on a satellite Honda. Even the announcers were taking digs at how long it has taken BMW to react to known issues; tire management in particular as Corser once again faded from podium position in the second half of the race.
Italian rumor mill is already ablaze claiming both haslam and corser are out at the end of the year and that bmw might try to throw a ton of money at checa

Extremely unlikely of course since carlos is the obvious #1 pick for the returning ducati team and is rumored to get hands on with the short stroke 1200 soon...

Last edited by Dave; 06-02-2011 at 11:52 AM..
Dave is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 12:03 PM   #7
fasternyou929
SFL Expatriate #2
 
fasternyou929's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Raleigh, NC
Moto: CBR1000
Posts: 2,043
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave View Post
Italian rumor mill is already ablaze claiming both haslam and corser are out at the end of the year and that bmw might try to throw a ton of money at checa

Extremely unlikely of course since carlos is the obvious #1 pick for the returning ducati team and is rumored to get hands on with the short stroke 1200 soon...
Kicking Haslam to the curb in short order, eh? Can't fault them if they try to pursue Checa, he's riding confident and smart this year, but I can't say I think all BMW's problems are rider-related.

BMW needs a rider that gives detailed development feedback and engineers that will listen to them. I'm not sure they have either piece of that puzzle now?
fasternyou929 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 12:13 PM   #8
Dave
Chaotic Neutral
 
Dave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Cherry Hill NJ
Moto: GV1200 Madura, Hawk gt
Posts: 13,992
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by fasternyou929 View Post
Kicking Haslam to the curb in short order, eh? Can't fault them if they try to pursue Checa, he's riding confident and smart this year, but I can't say I think all BMW's problems are rider-related.

BMW needs a rider that gives detailed development feedback and engineers that will listen to them. I'm not sure they have either piece of that puzzle now?
They def don't. You could tell there was an ego problem when they fired tardozzi.

They're prettymuch the new york mets of motorcycle racing
Dave is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 03:21 PM   #9
Particle Man
Custom User Title
 
Particle Man's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Central NY
Moto: 2003 SV650S
Posts: 14,959
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave View Post

They're prettymuch the new york mets of motorcycle racing
minus the ponzi scheme stuff
__________________
I'm not "fat."
I'm "Enlarged to show texture."


Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away.
Particle Man is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 03:26 PM   #10
Rider
Moto GP Star
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 12,156
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by shmike View Post
I still think the BMW's race record is the best joke of all!
Can't get more accurate than this statement.
Rider is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:42 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.