Dip disagreement

[Amorok]

So all day today I've been looking at some dip Ulu put in the crock pot. It looked like some kind of cheese something for this weekend and it's a huge batch. All day I've been hopeful but wary. Hopeful because I could tell it had a high likelihood of meaty, cheesyness, but distrustful and a little bitter. Because of the goddamn Rotel.

Rotel is a chili, tomatoe concoction that supposedly "makes ordinary dishes come alive with Southwestern flavor." What it makes dishes come alive with for me is what I'd imagine the flavor of a dead 17 year old Honduran prostitute's foot rot to be like. Now ordinarily I would agree with you when you said "Just don't eat it." Well, that doesn't work. You see, I'm married to a NoDak, and apparently that shit is like catnip for NoDaks. She puts it in everything, and I hate that shit more every time I'm unpleasantly surprised by it.

I haven't eaten and I'm fucking starving, and I'm staring at cheese dip that will make me want to stab a priest if I eat it. I'm seriously that enraged by it. Ten years ago she asked me to try Rotel, so I did and immediately informed her that I despise not only the Rotel, but the company that makes it and the families of their employees. And yet for the last ten years, every single time she's made any kind of dip, that garbage reappears. Seriously, GIVE IT A FUCKING REST.

So now I'm starving, staring at cheese dip that I now cannot eat. Given that I haven't eaten since six last night, it's making me a little pissed.