Go Back   Two Wheel Fix > General > Off Topic

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-22-2011, 06:22 PM   #1
'73 H1 Triple
restorer of the original
 
'73 H1 Triple's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Zionsville,PA
Moto: '93 ZR1100 &'73 Kawasaki H1 500
Posts: 1,331
Talking So a guy gets hit in the crotch with a golfball a week before his wedding

A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the
crotch.

Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground, when he finally
gets himself to the doctor.

He says, "How bad is it doc? I'm going on my honeymoon next week and
my fiancee is still a virgin in every way."

The doc said , "I'll have to put your penis in a splint to let it heal
and keep it straight. It should be okay next week."

So he took four tongue depressors and formed a neat little 4-sided
bandage, and wired it all together; an impressive work of art.

The guy mentions none of this to his girl, marries, and on his
honeymoon night in the motel room, she rips open her blouse to reveal
a gorgeous set of breasts.


This was the first time he saw them.


She says, "You are my FIRST, no one has ever touched these breasts."


He whips down his pants and says... " Look at this, it's still in the CRATE...
'73 H1 Triple is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-22-2011, 07:04 PM   #2
Particle Man
Custom User Title
 
Particle Man's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Central NY
Moto: 2003 SV650S
Posts: 14,959
Default

Particle Man is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-22-2011, 09:10 PM   #3
Adeptus_Minor
Hopster
 
Adeptus_Minor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Austin, TX
Moto: 2009 Buell 1125R
Posts: 4,743
Default

Approved.
__________________
“Well, obviously before; after was all gendarmes and dick stitches.”
Adeptus_Minor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-23-2011, 03:09 PM   #4
Kaneman
AMA Supersport
 
Kaneman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Odessa, TX
Moto: 2000 Honda CBR1100XX Blackbird
Posts: 4,931
Default

Probably would've been more funny if I hadn't taken a knee right to the boys in Jiu Jitsu this morning.
__________________
1982 Honda XR80 - blown motor, 1993 Kawasaki ZX6D - sold, 2001 Suzuki Bandit 1200S - sold, 1984 Honda Magna - sold, 2001 Kawasaki ZRX1200R - blown motor, 2007 Suzuki DL1000 V-Strom - totalled, 2003 Yamaha FZ1 - sold, 1994 Honda Magna - sold, 2001 Honda CBR600F4i - sold, 1998 Suzuki DR350 - stolen, 1989 Honda Super Magna - sold, 2007 Yamaha Stratoliner, 2000 Honda CBR 1100XX Blackbird
Kaneman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-23-2011, 08:44 PM   #5
'73 H1 Triple
restorer of the original
 
'73 H1 Triple's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Zionsville,PA
Moto: '93 ZR1100 &'73 Kawasaki H1 500
Posts: 1,331
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneman View Post
Probably would've been more funny if I hadn't taken a knee right to the boys in Jiu Jitsu this morning.
Missed the block?
'73 H1 Triple is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-24-2011, 07:48 AM   #6
Particle Man
Custom User Title
 
Particle Man's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Central NY
Moto: 2003 SV650S
Posts: 14,959
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneman View Post
Probably would've been more funny if I hadn't taken a knee right to the boys in Jiu Jitsu this morning.
Gotta work on that sidestep
__________________
I'm not "fat."
I'm "Enlarged to show texture."


Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away.
Particle Man is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-24-2011, 10:57 AM   #7
Kaneman
AMA Supersport
 
Kaneman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Odessa, TX
Moto: 2000 Honda CBR1100XX Blackbird
Posts: 4,931
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by '73 H1 Triple View Post
Missed the block?
No its submission wrestling, no strikes.....I caught a knee in both balls as a guy tried to pass my open guard (both legs spread). Ouch.
__________________
1982 Honda XR80 - blown motor, 1993 Kawasaki ZX6D - sold, 2001 Suzuki Bandit 1200S - sold, 1984 Honda Magna - sold, 2001 Kawasaki ZRX1200R - blown motor, 2007 Suzuki DL1000 V-Strom - totalled, 2003 Yamaha FZ1 - sold, 1994 Honda Magna - sold, 2001 Honda CBR600F4i - sold, 1998 Suzuki DR350 - stolen, 1989 Honda Super Magna - sold, 2007 Yamaha Stratoliner, 2000 Honda CBR 1100XX Blackbird
Kaneman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-24-2011, 12:14 PM   #8
'73 H1 Triple
restorer of the original
 
'73 H1 Triple's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Zionsville,PA
Moto: '93 ZR1100 &'73 Kawasaki H1 500
Posts: 1,331
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneman View Post
No its submission wrestling, no strikes.....I caught a knee in both balls as a guy tried to pass my open guard (both legs spread). Ouch.
I think "ouch" is an understatement. Hopefully no permanent damage to the boys.
'73 H1 Triple is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-25-2011, 12:26 PM   #9
wildchild
cruiser
 
wildchild's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: on the run
Moto: '09 HD superglide, 16 Yamaha FZ 09
Posts: 2,749
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneman View Post
No its submission wrestling, no strikes.....I caught a knee in both balls as a guy tried to pass my open guard (both legs spread). Ouch.
that's why most guys don't spread their legs for other guys........I'm gonna get killed for this I know...
wildchild is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:53 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.