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Old 07-30-2009, 12:50 PM   #1
HurricaneHeather
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Default Dumb Joke Thursday?

Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better
on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering.

Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to
set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will
judge who does the better job.'

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.

They moused.

They faxed.

They e-mailed.

They e-mailed with attachments.

They downloaded.

They did spreadsheets!

They wrote reports.

They created labels and cards.

They created charts and graphs.

They did some genealogy reports

They did every job known to man.

Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.

Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed
across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power
went off.

Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known
in the underworld!!!!

Jesus just sighed...........

Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their
computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:

'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went
out!'

Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from
the past two hours of work.

Satan observed this and became irate.

'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come he has all
his work and I don't have any?'

God just shrugged and said,

JESUS SAVES!
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Old 07-30-2009, 02:44 PM   #2
Particle Man
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old but still funny
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Old 08-02-2009, 08:05 PM   #3
Apoc
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A dying woman decides to tell her husband she'd been unfaithful. She said she had put an ear of corn in her lock-chest everytime she'd cheated, and she wanted him to open it.

The man opens it and see's 3 ears of corn and 100000$. Since his wife was dying, he decided to forgive her, but just had to ask where the 100000$ came from...

"Oh", she replied, "everytime I got a dozen a corn, I sold them.'
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Old 08-03-2009, 11:33 AM   #4
PhiSig1071
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What do you call a Psychic midget that has escaped from prison?























a small medium at large!
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