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Old 04-28-2010, 01:15 AM   #1
askmrjesus
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Default Proof that Rap is bad

A little eight year-old girl in the back of a highway mobile Volvo, flashed me a gang sign today. She was like a chubby little white Tupac, with a wig.

At first, I thought maybe she just walks around like that all the time. Maybe she stuck her fingers in an electrical outlet, and they just stayed that way.

But, no. She went out of her way to hike her shoulders up, tilt her head to one side, and flash those little sausage fingers with the authority one usually expects from someone who's done hard time. For a second there, I thought she might be getting ready to pop a cap in my ass with a Tech-9.

So, in a prudent manner, I ducked down a little and surveyed the situation.

Mom and Dad had that glazed doughnut expression that usually relates to listening to NPR. All Things Considered. Self indulgent jazz riffs. The footwear of ancient Rome. They were definitely not listening to the cap-in- your-ass station.

Then it hit me. The Volvo driving bastards had bored an eight year-old girl into a life of crime.

It was only a matter of time.

JC
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Old 04-28-2010, 08:14 AM   #2
Homeslice
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You sure she wasn't asking you to give her the shocker?

Last edited by Homeslice; 04-28-2010 at 08:17 AM..
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:18 AM   #3
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Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away.
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:20 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Homeslice View Post
You sure she wasn't asking you to give her the shocker?


You're the reason we can't have any nice things.

There, I fixed it. Happy now, motherfuckers?

JC
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Last edited by askmrjesus; 04-28-2010 at 09:50 AM.. Reason: Blow me
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:32 AM   #5
LeeNetworX
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Quote:
Originally Posted by askmrjesus View Post


Your the reason we can't have any nice things.

JC

Well at least you don't as dearly commit to your grammatical errors as this chap did.
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:37 AM   #6
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Old 04-28-2010, 09:42 AM   #7
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Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away.
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